I have friends. Friends on campus. Friends that I love. But when I want to spend time with them…very often, I have to make an appointment. So goes life in the world of busy college students. It’s not that they don’t care and that they don’t legitimately desire the friendship as well…they just have insane lives with lots of classes, responsibilities and other friends demanding their time and attention. But, I would love to find them to talk sometimes. I would love to spill my bad day, ask for a hug, share my good news. But, for the most part I no longer try...because when I really need a friend, they just aren’t around. Unless, of course, I had an appointment… So I see her in the hall or pass her on campus and we both bemoan how much we miss the other. At which time we agree it has been too long and we need to plan a time to get together. I’m all about plans. If it’s in the plans, it will for sure be efforted towards taking place. We can make small talk over dinner. Or go for a quick drive. And the time is always well spent. But when the appointment is over I feel like our friendship is on pause. How is it unless I make a date, I always eat alone? How is it I can be the confidant but very rarely the confider? How is it when I really need a friend…I can never find one?
All of which I say not to whine...I truly cherish my friendships and conflicting schedules is really a very small fact of life...but I say it because I wonder if this is how God feels. I wonder if he feels like He’s been shoved into my day planner. Given a moment here or there. I make a date with Him at least once a week! And the appointments are good. Totally worth my time. But it doesn’t beat the “day to day life” friendship. I sometimes wonder if He just wishes that we could hang out. That He could talk to me and I would just listen. He’s always there when I seek him out…how often am I the one missing?
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